I'm Not Going Anywhere
by That Writer From the 2000's
Summary: A story of fun, friendship, adventure (somewhat), romance (later chapters, like starts at 3-4), and most of all COMEDY! Finn has been curious about Marceline and her... physique... for a very long time, and he has realized that she's not leaving Ooo any time soon, and he needs to find a way to stay with her, forever.
1. Chapter One

**Finn's nineteen, because why not? I don't own Adventure Time, Pen Ward does. Enjoy.**

Finn, the human, was walking up and down rolling grass hills just outside his tree fort; looking for adventure, bored out of his mind. He started singing softly to himself:

_Lada da data... I'm gonna bury you in the ground..._

_Lada da dada... I'm gonna bury you with my sound..._

Oh of course! He turned around and changed course for Marceline, the vampire queen's house. Now, unlike Finn, Marceline was still the same age as before, since vampires don't age. He walked into her cave and had a strange feeling he was being watched. He stopped at the entrance and surveyed the area, quickly spotting two small green eyes. "Found you!" He chuckled. She flew down, transforming from bat to vampire, and pouted at his enhanced skills and wit. Upon fully transforming, she was still a foot shorter than Finn. Floating up to his face her I audible pouting was heard by Finn, "You take all of the fun out of scaring you..." Signaling Finn to follow her to her house, Marceline floated into her living room, Finn wasn't paying much attention to where he was going and hit his head against the door frame, _Fuck that hurt. _Marceline looked away and tried to hold in her laugh, letting out a chuckle. Finn's ears perked up as he heard her. "What's so funny?" "Nothin'." She looked and saw Finn holding his head. She quietly asked him, "Did you really hit your head?" Finn nodded. "HAHAAHA!" Marceline was floating sideways midair rolling around laughing as Finn pursed his lips and looked away in embarrassment. He reached for the door, which made Marceline stop laughing so hard until it stopped altogether. "I was just kidding, did you actually get hurt?" She inquired. "No, I just hit my head straight on a door frame. I feel fine, do you mind if I just..? Oh, that feels good." He slowly lied down on the floor and passed out. "Finn... Finn... Finn. What will we do with you?" She picked him up and floated him into her bedroom, resting him on the bed. She was considering some options,

_Option A. I could pretend like Finn slept with me, dude he'd FLIP OUT!_

_Option B. I could actually do something in case he's hurt._

_Option C. Come on Marcy, all plans have three options... Just think... Shit, I got nothin'._

She decided to help him out, by lazily getting an ice pack and putting it on Finn's head. She slowly floated into the shower room, undressing and getting ready to bathe. "Ugh..." Finn was waking up. Marceline heard him waking; _Damn it, just got out of my clothes... _She put on a her new clothes to cover herself and went out to check up on Finn. He was holding his head, he looked up and saw Marceline in new clothes staring down to him. She had her hair worn how he liked it, half-shaved off. "Thanks," he said. "For what?" "Everything." He grabbed her hand and put it to his lips, kissing it, making her blush slightly. Finn's eyes suddenly widened as he realized what just happened, he didn't know what to do, so he just awkwardly remained with Marceline's hand to his face. After a long, awkward pause, she pulled her hand away and raised an eyebrow, "You should get some sleep, some serious happens are goin' on in your brain right now." She opened her closet doors and took some jeans, boots, and a grey tank top out, while she noticed Jake's escape tunnel he dug with a spoon. She slightly smiled at the memory of Finn and Jake being trapped in her room. She brought her new new clothes to the shower, oblivious to the empty bed in her room. She closed the door and locked it, dropping her towel and pulling back the shower curtain. She looked into the shower and screamed, covering her eyes. Finn was in the shower, butt naked, with a shower cap, on top of that, he was using her loufa. He pivoted around and screamed, cutting off the water and running out of her bathroom with a towel. She put on her towel and went out into her bedroom. "What the hell were you doing in my shower!" "I thought you turned it on for me as a kind gesture for assaulting me via a doorway!" "Assaulting you? You hit your fucking head on a door in my house, and that's my fault? No." "Well, you could've knocked!" "On _my own_ shower door, where _I_ take showers, in _my_ home. Finn, just apologize and be done with this, I'm tired!" Finn put on his blue hoodie, jeans, sneakers, and socks. He left and went home, telling Jake about he and Marceline's recent mishap.

Next Morning:

"Makin' pancakes, Makin' bacon pancakes, make some bacon and I put it in a pancake, bacon pancakes, that's what it's gonna make, bacon pancaaaakes!" Jake sang his breakfast song half awake, as a knock was heard on the door. He turned the gas off and vaulted down the ladder to their treasure room. He opened the door, there was nobody there, until Marceline popped out from the top of the doorframe with a demon form in hopes of scaring Jake. Jake didn't flip out, but he did have a huge, conspicuous smile. Marceline looked at him, parasol in hand, and asked why he had the most blatantly obvious smile. "Well, a certain event that happened last night, of the... shower variety..." He responded hinting at Finn's shower screw up. "He told you!" She hissed, "Get him down here now." "He's not awake yet." He responded with half open eyes, because he himself was tired and restless from parenting at Lady's for the weekend. Marceline glanced at Jake and flew in, Jake flailed his arms in the air and mumbled/yelled to Finn, "I tried to shtahp hur Furrn... She wuz too powerferl..." He lethargically climbed the ladder and napped on the couch. Marceline reached Finn's bedroom, finding nobody. The window was open and she saw Finn, in his plaid red and black pajama bottoms and white undershirt sprinting across the rolling green hills. _Gotta get away, gotta get away, gotta get away..._ He turned to look for Marceline and saw no one. Phew, what a relief. He turned his head back and saw Marceline right there staring at him, keeping his pace, but floating instead. He took a dead stop and tried to think of an excuse. "So you told Jake? Huh?" She asked the hero. "No, he uh... Read a... My mind... He read my mind!" He put together a sentence, staring down at the ground in shame. "Oh, okay." She replied. "You believe me?" He sounded astonished. "No, I don't believe you! Why'd you tell him?" Finn now knew he was in deep shit now, excuse... I need an excuse... "You know vampires can read minds, right?" She lied. "What? Fine, I'm sorry for telling Jake. Happy?" He retorted "I really can't, 'just wanted to know what you we're thinkin'." She teased him playfully. Finn had to think fast, he laid out his options:

_Option A. I pretend I don't like her and say the shower was a mistake._

_Option B. I tell the truth and say I do like her, shower was a mistake._

_Option C. I tell the COMPLETE truth and say I do like her, and the shower was on purpose._

"I'm waiting," She said impatiently. Finn thought to himself, _It's descision time_.

Authors Note: I love writing about Finn and Marcy. Haters and trolls, please direct yourselves it the exits on the top right of the screen, or that back arrow in your browser. No need to hate on my story, other people may like it, even if you don't, the world doesn't revolve around fat people sitting on their computer all day trolling and hating. Thank you to all my honest readers.

.com (Artistically Challenged When it Comes to Adventure Time.)


	2. Chapter Two

Author's Note: My real name is Andy, so you can refer to me as Andy in the comments if you would like. I also accept Sir Andy: Lord of Awesome, Coolest of Hipsters. Then again, just call me Andy. I hope you enjoy the chapter, and I will try to update sooner!

Second Chapter:

Marceline was becoming visibly angry at this point, waiting for Finn's response. Finn looked at her and knew he couldn't lie, "Marceline, I'm your friend, and I hope you don't look at me different…" She started to ease her angry face and looked more curiously at Finn, "I like you, and I think I like like you." She raised her eyebrows and smirked at his answer, "Well Finn, I-," Finn interrupted her, "Wait, I'm not done. I like like you to the point of, well…" Marceline didn't care what he was going to say, she shut his mouth with her hand and kissed him on the cheek. Finn stopped speaking and completely lost his train of thought as he saw Marceline, the same Marceline that tried to decapitate him with an axe bass, kiss him on the cheek. Marceline started to float away to her cave as Finn grabbed her arm, spun her around and kissed her on the lips, Marceline kissed back for a while, until finally she grabbed him by the hand. "Where are we going?" Finn asked. "My place." Marceline winked.

Marceline's Cave:

Marceline and Finn were practically running to her house to make love, but when they opened the door Marceline took a dead stop. Hunson. "Dad, what are you doing here?" She asked her father, who was rummaging through her records and tapes. "Just stopping by to say hi to my little bat, is this the same boy that was 'super-good'," Hunson said making air quotes, " He looks more intimidating, is he evil?" Hunson joked. "Nope, still 'super-good'. What are you doing here though?" Finn asked. Hunson replied, "That's a shame, I was kinda hoping that you were a vampire. You know, so you wouldn't leave my daughter's heart broken when you're killed." Hunson made a finger gun with sound effects. "How do you know, or why do you think rather, I'm going to be killed?" Finn asked, questioning the randomness of this event. "Oh, well rumor has it that Death wants your soul, blah blah blah, he sent three of his best men to go and retrieve it." Hunson said in a gossipping manner. "Dad, you won't let that happen... Right?" Marceline asked, "Well you see, our dimensions are like Rock Paper Scissors: Nightosphere beats Ooo, Ooo beats Evil, Evil gets destroyed, Death beats Nightosphere, and Nightosphere beats Ooo." He replied, avoiding the answer that was simply put, no. "Get out!" She hissed. "I was going anyway, to suck up all the souls in - no I'm just kidding. You kids have fun." Hunson said making a portal back to the Nightosphere. When he left Finn grabbed her hand and pulled her in for a hug, "I'm not going anywhere." He reassured her.

Marceline's Bedroom:

Finn climbed up her stairs rapidly, taking off his shirt to reveal his muscles, while Marceline took off her shirt and jeans to reveal some black laced undergarments. He practically tackled her onto the bed and tore off her clothes, pressing his body against hers, sucking her breasts and rubbing her womanhood. Around 30 minutes later they had finished making love, and Marceline's head was resting on his chest. They both breathed heavily after the experience, "First time?" She asked him. "Yeah, I saved it for you." He replied, which made Marceline very special. Marceline felt her stomach grumble, so she pulled off the blanket and put a long shirt on. "Marceline, why did your dad seem so fixed on me being evil?" Finn asked her, she felt her heart sink. "No reason, he just doesn't like me hanging around good people. I don't really know for sure." She lied. "Marcy, I've known you for six years now. Please, if you want this relationship to work out, tell me the truth." He persuaded her to tell the truth. "When you were asleep one night, I was on your roof seeing what there was to be seen. My dad told me to do something that would help out Ooo. He said, when you are ready, and Finn is old enough, turn him into something evil. It could be anything, from a vampire to a *gulp* penguin." She said. "Vampires don't die of natural causes, right? So, I wouldn't die in 70-80 years, assuming I'm not killed." He thought for a second, "Marceline, I have always looked at you in a careful way, like a delicate flower. I know that's not what you want to hear, but that's how I picture you. A flower that is strong when it needs to be, but gentle when it wants to be. I don't want to ever lose that, and I don't want to ever lose you. Marceline Abadeer, will you marry me?" He asked, pulling out a blood red diamond ring. "Oh my glob, Finn. I... I-I love you, and I forever will, but no. I just need more time to-" She was interrupted by Finn taking his ring back, grabbing his clothes and booking it straight to his house, leaving a trail of tears behind. On his way back he pulled something out of his pack, a magic stone that could morph into a guitar. As he got his guitar out, he started singing a song.

"What am I to you? Am I a joke, your knight, or your brother?

What am I to you? Do you look down on me cause I'm younger?

Do you think that I don't understand? I just wanted us together and to play as a band,

last night was the most fun I've ever had! Even liked it when the two of you would get mad at each other..."

Before he even knew it, he was at the door to his house. He looked in and saw his brother, Jake, in a pool of blood. He threw the door open and bolted over to his brother, "J-Jake?" Finn asked, a catch in his throat. "Jake! Jake!" He repeated. Jake woke up and sighed, sitting up and stretching his arms out. "Jake?" Finn asked wiping his tears away from his eyes. Jake looked at him and realized what he thought had happened, "Finn, they're everywhere. This is a trap that they've set. Get out please... before they get you..." Jake said slightly smiling. Finn looked up and saw a bunch of mini rainicorns. Oh all jumped down screaming, "Alvin's hot juice box! Alvin's hot juice box! Alvin's hot juice box!" He fell over laughing as Jake stood up and licked the ketchup off the ground. Jake's kids were all tickling Finn, making him almost pee his pants. Reacting to Jake's pups, Finn stood up and picked them all up tickling the majority of them all at once. Marceline was just outside of the window, looking in to see that Finn had seemingly moved on, causing her to fly away crying.

Marceline's Cave the Following Night:

Finn walked to Marceline's cave the next night, with a box of chocolate covered strawberries. He was going to tell Marceline that he was sorry for proposing, but someone had spiked his drink with a large amount of alcohol that day 'for the fun of it'. He knocked on the door and when Marceline answered it, she had her hair shaved again to how he liked it, half and half. She was wearing a grey tank top, blue jeans, and sandals. "Marcy, I'm sorry about yesterday..." Finn started. "Yes." She said blankly. "What?" He asked. "I will! I will marry you! There's nobody else that could possibly be as great as you!" Finn was so excited, he pulled out the ring and then as he put it on BLAM AWHAM FLAM! Done. Nothing could've gone better. Then, Finn woke up.

Authors Note: I loved how that ending came out, it was kind of funny... I guess. Please review, it helps me know where to take the story.


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